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Crap That I Own

DVDs

Transformers: The Movie	The first DVD I owned. A gift from a friend, and I've watched it almost as many times as I've watched Fight Club.
Fight Club	Damn this is a good movie. When I first got my DVD player, this was the first movie I purchased. It is entirely possible that I have now watched this movie more than any other movie. OK, that's probably not true, it's probably in third place behind Dune and Reservoir Dogs.
The Big Lebowski	Whenever I read reviews of Coen Brothers movies, or articles about the guys, people always cite this movie as the worst that they've done. I really don't know what that is all about... This is far and away my favorite. It has cool music, cool characters, and Steve Buscemi. And The Dude. Can you ask for more? I don't think that I can...
O Brother, Where Art Thou	I really like this movie. It has an excellent Zen kind of feel to it, and really cool music.
Down From The Mountain	As a matter of fact, the music was so cool that they got all the artists together for a concert, filmed the concert and released it as a film. I can pop this in any time and just listen to it while I pretend to clean my apartment.
Cast Away	I bought this as a gift and never ended up giving it. Not my favorite movie, but I do own it.

Books

Stephen King	The Dark Tower I: The Gunslinger	I think that The Dark Tower series it the best stuff that Stephen King has done. This was a short book, little more than an introduction to the series.
Stephen King	The Dark Tower II: The Drawing of the Three	So far, this is my favorite in this series. It had lots of time travel, people going crazy, not-sees, and stickups of pharmacies for penicillin. Of all the Stephen King I've read, this book, The Stand, and The Talisman are probably my favorites.
Stephen King	The Dark Tower III: The Waste Lands	This was a cool story, a continuation of The Dark Tower series. My biggest complaint is that this book was published in 1992, and ended with a cliffhanger. King then waited a full five fucking years before he published the next book in the series. There really was no reason for that cliffhanger. He could have just as easily tacked the first chapter of the next book on to the end of this one and spared us those five years of wondering if he was going to publish the next one before he retires.
Stephen King	The Dark Tower IV: Wizard and Glass	Well, he finally did clear up the cliffhanger, but this book didn't do too much to advance the story. Mainly, this is a flashback story about Roland growing up as a kid. I liked it, but many people I've talked to about it didn't. In this one, he starts to cross over into several of his other books. It's not surprising that Randall Flagg, his generic devil/evil guy from books such as The Stand and Eyes of the Dragon shows up. I think this series still has a lot of potential, and according to King's web site, the next book won't be out until fall of '03. Ick...
Richard Bachman	The Regulators	Written by Stephen King's pseudonym, this book involves a story that somehow integrates with Desperation, which was released at the same time. I don't think I ever read this one.
Stephen King	Desperation	This is the other book that links in with The Regulators. I started reading it, but never finished it. It wasn't anything special, if I remember right.
Stephen King	Eyes of the Dragon	This book takes place in an old-timey fantasy universe, with wizards and such. Randall Flagg is a prominent character in it, and I wouldn't be surprised if we run into some of the characters from this book in the Dark Tower series eventually.
Stephen King	Nightmares and Dreamscapes	A collection of short stories. I don't think there was anything remarkable in here at all.
Stephen King	Gerald's Game	A woman is out at a country home with her husband, and they decide to do some bondage fantasy. They apparently don't know that with this sort of play you are supposed to have a safe word, telling your partner to stop. He gets a bit out of hand, and she gives him a nice kick, at which point he hits his head on the bedpost, breaks his neck and dies, leaving her handcuffed to the bed miles from anybody else. The plot revolves around her sitting there slowly dying. I remember liking it, but it's been a while since I read it.
Stephen King	Dolores Claiborne	I remember almost nothing about this book. I guess it eventually was made into a movie starring Kathy Bates. What the hell is she up to these days?
Leon Lederman and Dick Teresi	The God Particle: If The Universe is the Answer, What Is The Question?	Kind of the "Brief History of Time" of particle physics. I guess from the title I was expecting a bit more philosophizing from the author, but I think he's more of a hard-core atheist than even Stephen Hawking. Nevertheless, it was an interesting read on the history of particle physics, and has lots of cool stories about the big players in this field.
Dave Eggers	A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius	Too hip for me, apparently. Amazon would not shut up telling me that I need to buy this book, so I eventually caved. It's mainly an autobiographical account of Dave Eggers raising his brother after the death of his parents. I guess Eggers now runs the McSweeny's literary journal, which again is apparently far, far too hip for me. Eggers is supposed to be important, but this book just really didn't do it for me. I did read the whole thing, and it was somewhat interesting, but I wouldn't put it in the "important" category or anything...
Eric Schlosser	Fast Food Nation	This is one of several books I've purchased only because of a good review in The Onion. I think I was really expecting more of an update of The Jungle for modern times, but I didn't find too much in this book that really shocked me. Big fast food corporations make unhealthy food. Working in a slaughterhouse is dangerous. Eh... I just didn't find too much to get worked up about. I guess everybody already knows they shouldn't be eating so much fast food...
David Sedaris	Me Talk Pretty One Day	David Sedaris is a frequent contributor to This American Life on NPR. This is another book that Amazon told me for almost a full year that I had to buy. I finally broke down, and I certainly don't regret it. My only complaint is that it was too short... I think I read the whole thing in about two days. It's mainly a collection of essays about David's life. Stories about living in New York, stories about growing up, and stories about living in Paris. (It's a tough life for Mr. Sedaris...) Very funny. I'm reading another of his books, and when I'm laying in bed reading, I catch myself making lots of too-loud snorting laughs and embarrassing myself. I highly recommend these ones...
David Sedaris	Naked	I'm actually just now reading this one. More funny stuff, and again, highly recommended.
Sarah Vowell	Take the Cannoli: Stories From the New World	Sarah Vowell is another frequent contributor to This American Life. I don't know if I'm so infatuated with her because of her incredibly cute voice, because of the really cool stories she tells, or just because it seems like the hip thing to do to be into Sarah Vowell, but she's got me under her spell. I really liked this book... She has stories about marching band in High School, stories about hanging out with her gun-nut dad, and a very cool story about retracing the Trail of Tears with her sister. I have exactly two complaints about this book: Number one, it is too short. It took me two days to read this, and I probably could have finished it in one if I sat down and plowed through it. And number two, I had already heard many of these on This American Life, but that's not much of a complaint. As a matter of fact, if you have an hour to kill, I'd definitely suggest listening to the Trail of Tears episode. That's one of my favorites from the show, and from this book.
?	Principia Discordia or How I Found Goddess And What I Did To Her When I Found Her	This is the essential text of the gag religion Discordianism. I bought this after reading Robert Anton Wilson's Illumnatus trilogy. This is little more than a pamphlet, but pretty damn funny. An excerpt: An interview with Malclypse the Younger: GP: Is Eris true? M2: Everything is true. GP: Even false things? M2: Even false things are true. GP: How can that be? M2: I don't know man, I didn't do it. A cool book. All hail Eris! fnord
David Letterman	The Late Night With David Letterman Book of Top Ten Lists	It's a book of top ten lists. I got this as a gift from a roommate I had in college. He was cool, and he looked like Jesus. As a matter of fact, I think he played Jesus in a play for his church group.
Tom Robbins	Half Asleep In Frog Pajamas	I've read a bunch of Tom Robbins, and I can rarely remember much about them after I finish, other than I really enjoyed them, and they are all very funny. This particular one is written entirely in the second person. It begins, "The day the stock market falls out of bed and breaks its back is the worst day of your life. Or so you think. It isn't the worst day of your life, but you think it is." You turn out to be a 29 year old Filipino woman by the name of Glen Mati. And back to where I started... I don't remember much other than the fact that I enjoyed the book.
Chuck Palahniuk	Survivor: A Novel	Novella, maybe. None of Chuck Palahniuk's books are that long. I think I've read all four of his books now, and this is by far my favorite. It centers on a man who is the sole survivor of a suicide cult, who through various twists and turns ends up being mistaken for a messiah. Chuck's style is very cool, a lot of short sentences, and recurring phrases. Anyway, the chapter numbers in this book count down to the climax, and I remember really liking the ending.
Chuck Palahniuk	Invisible Monsters	His first book, and somewhat Fight Club-esque. I don't think this was published until after the Fight Club movie got big, and Invisible Monsters is not as polished as his others. But interesting. About a former model who had half of her face blown off, and goes on a cross country trip to ruin an old model friend's wedding. I think. My long term memory has been destroyed by alcohol consumption...
Hunter S. Thompson	The Great Shark Hunt: Strange Tales From a Strange Time (Gonzo Papers Vol. 1)	A collection of articles written by the good doctor in his heyday. All previously published, but written and published before I was born. Lots of good stuff in here. Political stuff, travel pieces about South America... I liked it, but it took me a while to get through. I'd read an article or two and read another book, coming back to it when I was done. HST in his journalistic prime.
Chuck Palahniuk	Choke	Not my favorite Palahniuk book, but I did really like parts of it. It is said to be about a guy who fakes choking at restaurants in order to get people to take pity on him. That's what I had read about it at least, but that really wasn't a big part of the book. If you've read some other Palahniuk and like it, read this one too. I'd suggest Survivor first, though.
Steve Martin	Pure Drivel	A collection of essays written by Steve Martin. Mostly previously published in The New Yorker, but all incredibly funny. Everyone should read this, and if you'd like to borrow my copy, email me.
Steve Martin	Shopgirl	This copy is signed... A friend bought it for me for Christmas last year. It is my most prized possession. You can't borrow it. It's about a woman living and dating in LA. Kind of a depressing book, and this is Steve's first foray into novel writing. I hope he doesn't stop here. And I need to go see Novocaine...
Terry Slater Marguilies	Oscar's New Neighbor	A girl moves into the trash can next to Oscar the Grouch. She's a bitch to him until he finally tells her off. Then she makes up and they become friends. I tore out the last page, so it ends with Oscar telling her off. I think it's better that way. Hmm... Is it any wonder I'm single?
Neal Stephenson	Cryptonomicon	This book follows three stories. Two take place in World War II, one centered on a cryptologist working on breaking German codes. The other World War II story centers on a special forces type guy who has to perform all kinds of weird missions to plant counterintelligence to make the Germans believe their codes have not been broken. There's also a modern day story of the descendants of the two WWII era protagonists looking for buried gold in Guam (I think). This was a very cool book, and I've been told I should read some more Neal Stephenson. And one of the chapters actually includes some working Perl code used to decrypt a message... Cool...
Brian Herbert and Kevin J. Anderson	Dune: House Atreides	The first of the Dune prequel trolley, this follows the story of Duke Leto Atriedes growing up and rising to his status as duke of House Atreides. Written by Brian Herbert, son of original Dune author Frank Herbert, this book certainly doesn't have the political complexities and depth of the original Dune series, but being an avowed fan, I do like to read more stories set in the Dune universe. I think that what most bothered me about this book was how there seemed to be at least two sentences in every paragraph about the Harkonnens to remind you that they're bad people. OK, we get it... The Harkonnens are bad.