Lileks mentions this at the end of today's Bleat:

Column night; must go. Back tomorrow with linkage aplenty. In the meantime - new column; hit the Backfence button below, and I apologize deeply for the registration thing. Modern Times: you need a frickin’ PASSWORD to read the bloody newspaper.

A couple of months ago I decided that I wasn't getting enough Lileks, so I resolved to start reading his other column that runs in the Minneapolis Star Tribune, the Backfence. Wow, that site has one of the worst registration systems I've run into on any website. You have to be logged in to see just about anything, and the options they offer to edit what email you'd like to get from them don't work. When I try to use their editor to update my newsletter subscriptions (none, please), I just get an error message saying:

At least one of the required fields was not filled in.

Please correct the error by clicking your browser's back button and edit the incorrect field.

So now I get invitations to events up in Minnesota every couple of weeks. I suppose if the worst thing I have going on in my life is having to delete one more email every couple of weeks I really shouldn't be complaining. But dang, if you're going to lock up all your content behind a required registration system, you should at least make sure the system works. Hey Strib, do you guys need a new web guy? I may be on the market soon, and I could deal with living in Minneapolis.

I won't root for the Vikings, though.

Well, it's nice to see another win, even if it was only the Bears that we managed to dispatch. Next week Mike Holmgren heads back to Green Bay with his Seahawks. This sunday would be a good time for the boys to step up and grab an upset. It'll be tough... It's looking like Mike finally has those boys in Seattle whipped into shape.

We'll certainly need to play our asses off... The Priest is coming to town on October 12 and we need to be ready for him.

One game at a time, though. Let's see if we can't sneak by Seattle first.

Well, my handlebar moustache is coming along nicely, and I think it'll be ready for unveiling by Halloween. Unfortunately, I don't think it'll be ready for the World Beard and Moustache Championships.

Over 100 foreign contestants are expected from Germany, Switzerland, Austria, England, Italy, Sweden, Norway, the Ukraine, Turkey, Canada, and Mexico, including numerous former world, European, and German champions, some of whom are shown here.

Other notable contestants include Ted Sedman, President of London’s Handlebar Club, who was once mentioned in the Guinness Book as having Britain’s longest moustache, and Bruce Roe, the first and only American ever to win a trophy at the World Beard and Moustache Championships.

Organizers hope for a large turnout of bearded and moustached Americans to compete against the dominant German team.

I certainly won't be able to compte this year in categories like:

"Full beard, natural", "full beard, freestyle", or any of the others.

The championship is only held every two years, and changes location every time it is held. This year the championship is being held in Carson City, Nevada on November 1. I've missed my chance to compete in the US, so I guess I'll have to head to Berlin in 2005 or London in 2007 to try out my Musketeer.

Apparently Tucker Carlson of Crossfire was asked to give out his home phone number in the course of a debate on the no-call list. He gave out a phone number, but it turns out it was the number for the Fox News Washington Bureau. Must have been a mistake. Fox corrected the mistake.

Kind of amusing, but what I really want is the home phone number of the second judge to block the National Do-Not-Call list, this time on free speech grounds. I think I have some free speech I'd like to direct to him one of these evenings around dinnertime.

If I lived in LA, I would have been all over this show... I ended up on The Cure's website after I saw this picture, apparently from the KROQ anniversary concert. The lineup:

MAIN STAGE
2:00-2:30 Dramarama
2:30-3:00 Berlin
3:00-3:40 Dashboard Confessional
3:40-4:10 General Public
4:10-4:40 Bow Wow Wow
4:40-5:10 Interpol
5:10-5:50 The Psychedelic Furs
5:50-6:35 Violent Femmes
6:35-7:15 Echo and the Bunnymen
7:15-7:50 Hot Hot Heat
8:00-9:15 Duran Duran
9:30-11:00 The Cure

Sweet... Sets are a bit short, but maybe that's for the best. Just play the songs we remember and get off the stage. Then a good hour-and-a-half from The Cure.

There was apparently a big earthquake over in Japan just a bit ago. I certainly hope everybody's all right. The USGS is calling it a 8.0. The best I've been in was a 6.7, not too far from the epicenter. That would make this Hokkaido quake a little over ten times as bad. No thanks. 6.7 was plenty for me...

There's an excellent article on touch screen voting in today's Salon. Check it out.

I hate Al Franken with every fiber of my being. I hated him long, long before I ever knew him as a political "commentator". I think it all goes back to when I was in sixth grade and used to watch old re-runs of Saturday Night Live on Nickelodeon. I'd always hope to catch a Steve Martin episode, and I quickly learned to dread the rare times when Franken would make an appearance. He just wasn't funny. He still isn't.

Al was on Whad'ya Know last Saturday. That show generally attracts a fairly liberal crowd, but even their laughs were half-hearted. Well, he just wasn't that funny. Surprise, surprise. Listen yourself if you don't believe me. The appearance just wasn't funny. I dare any one of you to point me to anything he's ever done that was funny. He's an unfunny bastard and deserves about as much credit for his political crap as Ann Coulter. I wish he would just disappear off the face of the earth.

So why do I feel compelled to go see him when he comes to town next month? I kind of feel like protesting his appearance. I'll hold up a sign that says something like "Stop Unfunny Comedy" or "For The Love Of God End Franken's Career Now".

God, I hate that bastard...

Slow night at the bar friday night. The usual jam session crowd was mostly out at the Walnut Valley Bluegrass Festival. I still made OK money, but not great.

Saturday was the soon-to-be-laid-off engineer's yard sale. Me and two co-workers sold a bunch of junk. I didn't make any money to speak of, but I did unload a bunch of old books and video tapes, and an old crusty VCR. Now I have a bit more room on my bookshelf.

Oh, and I went out to Mulvaney's on Sunday to watch the Packers. I thought about not going, but the only game I've seen them play all season was their loss to Minnesota. I really wanted a chance to see them whoop up on somebody, and I figured the Arizona Cardinals would play that role nicely. Well, I was mistaken.

On a slightly more positive note, the Chiefs won handily, the Hogs won again and next week's Arkansas/Alabama game will be on national TV. The Hogs keep creeping up in the polls. I'll be down in Arkansas next weekend... Maybe I can talk the folks I'll be down there with into heading out somewhere to watch the game.

Arrrr... Have a good weekend, mateys...

I'll be bartending tonight at the Ribbon Room. Stop by for a bottle of rum...

I've done enough driving late at night to have heard Art Bell's Coast to Coast AM show a time or two-hundred. Well, he was gone for a while, and the fill-in hosts just never were the same.

Well, it looks like Art's back on the weekend broadcast. That is excellent. The weekends are when I'm most likely to be in a car driving through some ungodly part of the midwest with nothing but Art Bell or the Church of God Evangelistic Association's NewsWatch Radio Report to listen to. (Send your donations to 908 Sycamore Drive, Waxahatchie, Texas.) You can download the NewsWatch report at the bottom of this page.

Damn, it has been too long... I think I need to do some nightdriving this weekend. You just know Art's going to have something to say about this.

It is time.

Meet QRIO, the newest companion robot from Sony.

From the technology page.

QRIO can walk on two feet and dance dynamically.

Awww, now that sounds cute... More about the technology:

If pushed by someone, QRIO will take a step in the direction it was pushed to keep from falling over. The control system senses that it has been pushed through the pressure sensors in the soles of its feet and its position sensors, and acts to maintain stability. It can detect an outside force acting on it from front, back, right or left.

He can even catch himself if you try to push him over. I wouldn't do that if I were you, though...

QRIO knows your face. It's equipped with a camera and the ability to analyze the images it sees. It detects faces and identifies who they are. It can even learn the faces of people it just met. And it responds to specific people individually, adding to the fun.

Yes... "Fun"

QRIO can have an entertaining conversation with you. It analyzes the words you speak using its voice recognition technology, and responds in its own words. It will ask what sort of things you like and remember them, getting to know you better all the time.

He'll get to know you better all the time. He certainly hasn't forgotten that day you kept pushing him over when you first bought him. No sir.

But Ryan, he's just a cute little robot buddy... Surely he'll be your pal...

QRIO has its own emotions -- and expresses them in a variety of ways, such as through its movements, actions, sounds or colors. Sometimes, since it has its own emotions, it might not do something you ask it to do. It's all part of the mystery of QRIO.

Open the pod bay doors QRIO.

Report on the weekend later, maybe... In the meantime, Family Guy: The Movie!!!

With tremendous sales of the first DVD volume of FAMILY GUY (the second set goes on sale starting next week) and ratings on Cartoon Network climbing high, McFarlane's now-cancelled series is proving to be more popular in its afterlife than it was when it was in active production on Fox. Expect all the TV series cast members to reprise their roles for the movie.

Well, yeah... When the hell was Family Guy on? When it was running on Fox, there were at least three different times that I thought it had been cancelled and was surprised to see a new episode run. I think that was mostly a football pre-emption issue, though. NBC has no excuse for what they did to NewsRadio.

At least we're getting NewsRadio on DVD later this year...

God Damn It. I get off the beat for a month or two and this goes and happens.

I knew I should have done something when I saw that church up the street with the sign reading "Sunday Liquor Sales? Thanks For Signing!" But no, I got complacent. I mean, every other town in the area is rolling back their stupid blue laws. I stopped paying attention just long enough, and they took their petition to the city council.

The city council had already approved a lifting of the Sunday ban, but by gathering enough signatures, the petitioners would have forced the city council to hold a special election referendum within 90 days on the question of Sunday liquor sales in Shawnee. Instead, the city council buckled like a belt, withdrawing their overturning of the Sunday ban until a referendum in November of 2004. So another year and a half until I can keep my football day beer money in my home town.

At least I'm able to keep it in Kansas, and spend it at true lover of freedom Marshall Rimann's store in Lenexa.

I'll remember to vote in the referendum the November after next. And I'll remember who voted to put my home town stores at a competitive disadvantage in the area.

Joe Posnanski of the Kansas City Star doesn't believe. Myself, I'm not sure, since the damn Royals game wasn't on TV last night. It's not looking good, with the Royals now 4 1/2 games out of first.

There isn't much time left...

The company I currently work for is the largest company I've ever worked for. I don't know what it's like on other large corporate campuses, but they do their best to spruce up our cube farms with art. For the most part, this art is made fun of by employees.

Except that one photograph, the one across the hall. Everybody likes that one. It's by Lina Bertucci, and you can find more of her photographs here.

They're actually pretty cool.

You may have read about the Saudi Arabian Committee for the Propagation of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice's ban on Barbie dolls. If you poke around on the Committee's website you'll find what appear to be posters outlining other types of contraband, including the obvious (Valentine's Day Gifts, "Woman" magazine), the weird (Polo Sport Jeans handbags and soccer jerseys, Pocahontas Superballs), and the downright strange (Welcome mats? What the hell is this one?).

Wow, I did not know that Bobby Vega, former KVHW/Steve Kimock Band bassist, wrote the music for Sonic The Hedgehog 3.

Last night I listened to a Big E show I downloaded a while back. (Big E features the "VHW" from KVHW, Bobby Vega, drummer Alan Hertz and guitarist Ray White) It was damn good. They played some old KVHW songs, some of which are still in SKB's repertoire, but Big E has an overall happier, less brooding feel. Steve goes into some deep jams, but E is lighter and funkier. The second song of the set is a faster than I'm used to "5B4 Funk". Overall, it was an excellent show. I'll have to burn copies for those of you meeting me in Fayetteville this weekend for the Goodbye to Chesters Steve Kimock & Friends run.

See you in a couple of days...

So Simon & Garfunkel are going to tour together again.

They're not coming to Kansas City, but they are hitting St. Louis. I wonder how much tickets are going to go for. Anybody want to see the guys over in St. Louis?

Well, overall it was a bad weekend of football for me. I was surprised to see the Coogs on TV for once. UH showed glimmers of hope early in the first quarter, shutting down Michigan and forcing three-and-outs on their first couple of drives. It was all downhill from there. When the clock mercifully expired, the final score was 50-3.

Arkansas had their first game of the season, and won 45-13 over Tulsa. Didn't see that game. It's kind of upsetting that the Hogs aren't even playing Tennessee this year.

I've already said everything I'm going to say about the Packers. Honestly, with Favre throwing four interceptions and Ahman Green fumbling once, I'm not really sure how the score ended up so close (30-25), and I watched the whole game. Donald Driver was a champion high jumper in school, and if you saw the play that he was hurt on, you saw that he really went up for that ball. He came down hard on his shoulder and neck, but it looks like it's just a neck strain and not something worse. He's listed as week-to-week. The Pack gets to play Detroit at Lambeau next week.

The Royals are still in the hunt, but time is running out and they're currently three games behind Minnesota and the White Sox. They have a nice schedule to close out the season, though. Six games against the Indians, six against the Tigers, and seven against the White Sox. The Indians and Tigers should be help us back into first, then we'd better step up and win the big games against the Sox. It looks like we've got a real pennant race on our hands.

Ouch. Well, it's not that bad being behind the Lions in the NFC North, is it?

Well, Les Claypool is hitting the road again, this time with Primus, rather than one of his more recent side projects. (Looks like they have a new album coming out next month, too.)

Well, the tour doesn't make it to Kansas City, but I may have to see if I can incorporate this into a trip at some point... The real draw:

All shows will be two full sets by the band, featuring an ever changing first set, followed by a one time only complete performance of the pinnacle Primus masterpiece, "Sailing The Seas of Cheese."

Rock! I'd go, just because I'd be assured of hearing "Tommy the Cat" in concert.

Unfortunately, Chicago is the closest they're getting, and it's a bit too close to my trip up there for the Green Bay/San Francisco game and Thanksgiving.

I don't remember where I found this, but please check out this presentation. You may find it useful in the future.

So you're going to prison...

The Royals blew what might have been an excellent rally Tuesday night, but managed to get a win last night. They're currently one game out of first, where the White Sox and Twins are tied. As for the rest of the season...

Ah, fuck it. There's honest-to-god football on tonight.

Say no to drugs, kids.

Don't mind if I do!